Secret Santa Files

One of the local elementary schools has requested Jacob to be their "authentic" Santa for the kindergartners this year!  After his successful Santa outfit fitting, he was presented with this:

We'll call it the Secret Santa File.  Inside was all of the files, photos, and instructions to make sure his Santa performance is flawless and authentic!!  First up, the script he has to memorize in response to the children's pre-rehearsed questions:

Since animosity is of the utmost importance in the authentic Santa endeavor, the two teachers who came to Jacob's fitting informed him that the only entrance he could come into the school was up the fire escape slide...they, of course, would have a rope hanging from it to help him out!

The Japanese are so efficient in their instructions!  This is Jacob's front view of where the children will be sitting:

And, if you'll direct your attention to diagram 1, you'll see Santa's entrance route...

...and exit route in diagram 2!

Jacob's bus directions:

"Get the 9:05, which is way too early.

Kill some time and then call us at 9:30.

Go up the secret rope.  We will greet."

The "secret rope" bit at the end is the best.  

Santa update to follow!

Parties and Testing and Chicken, Oh My!

December here in Japan is already proving to be just as packed with parties, events, and overall stress and rushing, as back home in the States.  This past Friday night was our school's bonenkai, or end of year party for all of the teachers.  As I've mentioned before, we have over 100 teachers at our school, so the celebration is quite huge.

And a huge celebration here just wouldn't be quite the same without some tasty treats that watch you as much as you stare back at them!!  Here is what I sat down to, and I was quite excited indeed:

A good rule of thumb is to be careful where you stick your fingers in this stuff...that fish still had teeth!

The theme of the night, besides the obvious seafood fanfare, was Hokkaido's own hairy crab...and LOTS of it!  I believe the proper term is おいしかったです (DELICIOUS!!!)!

The other word for "sushi" in the States is "bait."  The other word for "sushi" in Japan is "company bonus."

In addition to all you can eat food and drink, as well as some very prominent BINGO prizes, we each received a 500 yen ($5) gift certificate to Seven Eleven, the holy grail of combinis!

After a night 'o partying, however, it was time once again to crack down for my big Japanese Language Proficiency Test (JLPT) on Sunday.  Despite coming here with NO prior Japanese knowledge (except for "sushi," "karate," and "domo arigatou, Mister Roboto") I was somehow convinced by some JET-jerks back in August that the JLPT level 4 (lowest level) was soooooooo easy, and that I could TOTALLY pass it after only a few months here and that I NEEDED to pay the 5500 yen (60 bucks) and sign up for it.  That soooooo easy level turned out to be about 100 kanji, 800 vocab words, and pretty much all of the basic grammar points (and there ain't NOTHING basic about basic Japanese grammar)!!

The good news is that it really pushed me to study my butt off, and I have to admit that I have learned quite a bit more than I think I would have without the motivation.

(My friend, Toye, and I on test morning, right before our Mister Donut-last-minute-cram session.)

All-in-all, however, I have the sneaking suspicion of test-failure.  This fact, I believe, was further reinforced on the listening section when I had finished all of the questions, only to hear that there was one more to go.  Still don't know how I pulled off that one.  They make you wait until February to see your score...just enough time for me to forget all about the pain!

Last event of the weekend was our very own party:  "A Very Japanese-y Christmas."  Being slightly obsessed with Japan's strange Christmas "tradition" obsessions of KFC and Christmas cake, we decided to hold our own version of the country's merriment.  Sadly, I discovered that the actual KFC Christmas dinners couldn't be ordered until the 23rd, however, my fabulous Eri made us the best homemade Christmas cakes this side of Tokyo:

The spread, with the Colonel's loving gaze:

What would I do without this man and his incredible salads/foods/general talents?

Hello Kitty Chanmery...a 1% alcoholic Christmas drink.  That's hawt.

Fabulous JET peeps and party-goers!  We've been so lucky to have made such awesome friends since we've been here!

The end of a long, filling weekend...and I think we've only just begun!

Mr. December (And a KFC Christmas)

Here he is!  That jolly, white-bearded man dressed in red with a bag (or bucket) of goodies for everyone!  

You KNOW I'm talking about the Colonel:

Mr. December, besides sporting the utmost in holiday fashion, comes with an extra surprise:  the KFC Christmas Dinner Menu and order form!  That's right, before the most sacred of all commercial holidays, the Japanese flock to place their orders and stand in line for what they believe is a traditional Western Christmas dinner at KFC:

Both the Party Barrel and the Roast Chicken Barrel come with commemorative plates.  Now, if that isn't Amer-i-can, than I don't know what is.  Of course, if you're more of a traditionalist, they do offer the nugget-stuffed Christmas Pack (without a plate) instead:

If you really want to show your family what a good year you had, you can splurge for the Premium Roast chicken dinner.  I'm not quite sure if this thing gets stuffed in a bucket or not, but can't you just smell the 11 herbs and spices?

Your traditional dinner is best washed down with some sparkling KFC bubbly.  Don't worry, it's only 1% alcohol...perfect for thinning out the extra grease:

If you would like to experience your own interactive Japanese Kentucky Christmas, brought to you, of course, by Mr. December himself, you can do so here.

Thanksgiving!

Despite being in Japan, Thanksgiving did NOT disappoint this year (besides the fact that Jacob had to work) as we headed down to our favorite American ex-pat bar.  The owner, Phred, had quite the spread (extra-worthy of a rhyme)!  Turkey, oyster stuffing, rolls, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes and gravy, steamed veggies, cheesecake (because of an apparent pumpkin pie drought at Costco), and a marathon of Jennifer Lopez music videos on the tvs made us feel right at home!

Along with a plethora of Japanese, we had quite a few "Thanksgiving-First-Timers!"  Our fun Aussie friend, Sam, and the wonder that is root beer (also a first for many):

And Krystle and Adele, two lovelies from Trinidad and Tobaggo (who had to be coached in the fine arts of going back for seconds and thirds,  eating beyond one's limits, and NEVER saying "no" to dessert):

I'm so thankful for this opportunity to be in Japan, the chance meet such a diverse group of friends from all over the world, the ability to travel and explore new places, my family...oh yeah, and I suppose Costco in this case!  Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

The Secret Society of the Mystic Cherry Blossom

On Wednesday of this week I, after being here for four months already, had another welcome party for my school!  This time, the party was for women only--seeing as there are only 15 women working in the place (out of about 120 faculty and staff), it was a welcomed outing!

As soon as the party began, I was promptly informed, "Now, Crystal...this is a seeeeecret society.  This is the Secret Society of the Mystic Cherry Brossom!  It is because we are all strong, beautiful women.  We are most beautiful at night.  And also that's when there's beer."  An underground society of fabulous, beer-drinking, Japanese  women from my school!?!?!  Sweet!  It was seriously all I could do to keep from immediately planning the next year of monthly Blossom Gatherings!

I now introduce to you Prez, Sunshine, Calling-Cat, Miss Yoko, Bambi, akkeyTay, Princess, Snow-Sugar, and its newest member (me, duh!):  Mango Tango:

And, of course, what's a secret society anyway without some fabulous food!!!  A few of our entrees (because after-all a flower needs nourishment):

My welcome parties just keep getting better and better!

Stayin' On

For those of you saving up moolah and convincing yourselves that yes, you do NEED to come to Japan for a visit to us, well you officially have another year towards your goal.  Jacob and I did some discussing and have decided to stay on in Japan for another year after this one.  My school gave me my re-contracting papers a couple of weeks ago and they are now signed and filed! 

The guest-room is filled with blankets and the tatami mats are calling... 

First Snow and an Eskimo

So I'm cheating a bit.  This week was actually our second snowfall, but the first one didn't stick and, therefore, gets booted out of the title!  I love waking up and opening the door to a white blanket of muffled sound...everything just seems so clean and peaceful!

The snowy mountain vista from our window (you can't actually see the mountain, but I assure you it's still there):

This is when I'm ESPECIALLY grateful for my 40 second commute to work:

Functional AND design-worthy:

It's hard to imagine that the schoolyard looked like this only a few months ago!  I feel bad for the two students who actually still had to bike to school!

"Let's enjoying snow!"  

Yup, winter is here in good 'ol Hokkaido and it's gonna be a long one!

Obligatory Karaoke Post

It's no use avoiding the inevitable.  Especially not in Japan, where the number one inevitability is waiting for you deep inside long corridors of neon and within private rooms-o-fun.

I'm talking karaoke here, folks.

Up until this past weekend, I had been avoiding my destiny with karaoke.  I mean, don't get me wrong...I absolutely LOVED a great night of belting tunes out on the town back in the States.  But it just made me wonder:  what's a fabulous night of karaoke without a bar full of mullets, $2 Miller Lights, and plenty of strangers to croon Tina and Ike's version of "Proud Mary" along with you?

Here in Japan, the birthplace of the pastime, things aren't quite as "rustic."  First of all, you and your group are led to your own private room, themed if you so choose.  After ordering food and choosing your drink options, you can get down to business.

 If you're old school, you can choose your song from one of the three phonebook-sized song lists.  Otherwise, you can scroll through the computerized version and then enter your song numbers onto this:

The coveted karaoke remote can adjust volume, add background vocals, "help" your voice with a voice mask, and even "gong" someone off and onto the next song if you so choose!

You need more beers?  Out of food?  Just pick up the phone and order...no song-pausing necessary!

All-in-all, I have to give Japanese karaoke an "A" for cultural experience and potential future-fun!  However, in my mind, nothing will ever compare to "Bohemian Rapsody" in a dark, lively bar accompanied by raspy, smoke-stained, NASCAR-shirt-wearing, local-yokel, good 'ol Amer-i-can barsters.

I've entered a whole new realm.